Holding an open book with dust coming out.

Epic Tomes

Dearest Adventurers,

Our lore masters have searched the realm for tomes that are worthy of your attention and we have chosen three in particular that we have enjoyed reading.

Spoiler Alert

No spoilers in our descriptions… but there may be spoilers in the goodreads reviews.

NPCs

If you explore dungeons, slay dragons, or spend your time finding paths, it is important to be considerate to those who you encounter in your endeavors. You have a great capacity to impact the world around you, so try not to be careless. NPCs matter! So, when you get a chance, be sure to use the tome of NPCs that was created by the Master Enchanter Drew Hayes. He rolled a natural 20 during the tome’s creation.

Ready Player One

Maybe you’re the sort of adventurer who isn’t afraid of the plane of digital existence. If your first adventure included returning a magical chalice to a golden castle while three of the ugliest dragons known to mankind and a bat pursue you, then this is the scroll for you. If these references are unfamiliar to you, that’s okay, you’re still a square… just a different kind. You will probably still appreciate this scroll if you were raised in the realm of Atari. The scroll was crafted by an elite necromancer, Ernest Cline, who brings an ancient beast, called the 1980s, back to life. The scroll has been likened to “nostalgia porn”, so if that’s your thing, we recommend that you spring for the Thaumaturgist edition of the scroll which features an enchantment in which the scroll is read with Wil Wheaton’s voice.

Off to be the Wizard

If you prefer light-hearted tomes that combine technology with medieval times, then you might want to consider this scroll by Wizard Apprentice Scott Meyer. Use caution though, tinkering with magic can cause unwanted attention. Fair warning, if you are serious about any of the following things, this may not be the scroll for you.

  • Time Travel
  • Computer Programming
  • Plot holes
  • Life

Are there any tomes or scrolls that you’d recommend? We’d love to read them.

One comment

  1. I really like the Goblin Quest series by Jim C. Hines. It does a fantastic job both explaining and subverting fantasy tropes while making a world that stands on its own merits. It really changed the way I look at monsters in games due to staring the lowest creature on the fantasy food chain (Jig the Goblin) and making you care deeply about him as he encounters a party of Adventurers.
    I would appreciate a little more detail about these tomes, especially NPCs and Off to be the Wizard.

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